Divorce Mediation

Divorce mediation is an alternative to court litigation. With mediation, you and your spouse can develop your own solutions. Mediation can be faster and less expensive than traditional divorce in family court. Mediation is also a way to keep your divorce disputes private.

Some states require divorce mediation for child custody issues. Other couples choose private mediation to simplify their divorce filing. To find out more about the process of divorce mediation, talk to a local divorce lawyer.

Understanding the Divorce Mediation Process

Mediation is a type of alternative dispute resolution (ADR). Along with arbitration and collaborative divorce, these are alternatives to traditional court litigation. In family court cases, mediation can help couples resolve their disputes more quickly, for less money, and without having to fight it out in court.

Mediation can resolve any type of dispute. In family law, mediation helps divorcing spouses resolve issues around:

• Child custody and parenting time
• Visitation agreements
• Property division
• Spousal support/alimony
• Child support modifications

Court-Ordered Mediation

Many family law courts order mediation for divorcing couples. This is most common for divorcing parents with child-related issues. Family courts can refer married parents to a court-certified mediator or the state’s family court services.

Court-ordered mediation is beneficial for families going through a divorce to help come up with a custody and parenting plan. With mediation, co-parents can come up with their own plan and schedule and don’t have to leave it up to the court.

Private Mediator for Settlement Agreements

Separating spouses can use a private mediator to settle any divorce issues, including financial issues. Using a mediator can help speed up the divorce process because they have already decided the major divorce issues. After signing a divorce settlement, the spouses just have to file the paperwork with the court and wait for their final divorce decree.

The Role of a Mediator

A neutral third-party mediator is not like a judge. The mediator doesn’t decide the divorce dispute for you. The mediator facilitates negotiations to help you and your spouse come to an agreement. The mediator can talk to you and your spouse together and separately. They will try to narrow down the issues and help you come up with solutions. After you and your spouse come to a mutual understanding, you can sign the mediation agreement.

Benefits of Mediation vs. Litigation

There are many benefits of mediation in family law disputes. Typical divorce litigation is adversarial and may not be best for family disputes. In divorce cases where the couple has children, they will need to maintain a good relationship for the benefit of their children. Mediation can help parents communicate and work together in the best interests of their children.

You can get the outcome you want with mediation. When you are coming up with your own solutions, you can be more creative to find a solution that works for everyone. If the court decides, you may end up with a decision that no one is happy with.

Mediation can be more cost-effective than litigation. Fighting out divorce matters in court can require court filings, hearings, and conferences. This can all increase the attorney fees for both sides. Mediation is less formal and often resolves disputes more efficiently.

Mediation is generally faster than going through the courts. Family courts have a long backlog, and it can take weeks for the judge to hear your case. Mediators generally have more flexible schedules and can work around your availability to find a time to meet. Mediators may be able to help you resolve your dispute in just a few sessions instead of taking weeks or months.

Another major benefit of mediation is privacy. Traditional divorce proceedings are part of the public record. Your court filings and testimony are public documents and not subject to privacy. Mediation is confidential. Whatever you say to your neutral mediator is kept private and not part of the public record.

When Divorce Mediation Doesn’t Work

Mediation isn’t appropriate for all divorcing couples. Generally, the court does not require mediation sessions for couples with a history of domestic violence. Mediation where one partner tries to control or manipulate the other does not lead to ideal outcomes.

Mediation may not work if one or both parties have no interest in compromising. Mediation requires both sides to be open and communicate. If one side is not willing to change their position, mediation is not effective.

Tips for Successful Mediation

The most important tip for successful mediation is to go in with an open mind and positive outlook. Mediation works best when each side is willing to make it work. Listen to your spouse and try to understand their perspective. Stay focused on what is best for your children and family.

Try to find a mediator with whom you work well. Different mediators have different communication styles. Finding the right mediator can help the process go more efficiently and take less time. For questions about a mediated divorce and if it is the right choice for you, talk to a local divorce attorney for legal advice.